David and me in 2006 shortly after we began dating.The old saying when it rains it pours couldn't be more true. I sat here tonight feeling stuck in a hurricane.
Parts of my circumstances are from my own decisions but most have just surprised me. Next week I leave my comfy job, city, family and friends to move to a new city and new home. That brings quite an emotional toll. Meanwhile every expense under the sun seems to pop up right now. I am a bit shaky.
But this email forward really changed my thinking. Normally I skip over these but for some reason I chose to stop for this one. I am glad I did and hope you do, too.
Sure, circumstances might cause me to lose all of my savings. My car might break down ten more times. I might feel a bit lonely in my new home. I might be scared and cry a little just because.
"To celebrate growing older, I once wrote the 45 lessons life taught me... It is the most-requested column I've ever written. My odometer rolled over to 90 in August, so here is the column once more:
1. Life isn't fair, but it's still good.
2. When in doubt, just take the next small step.
3. Life is too short to waste time hating anyone...
4. Your job won't take care of you when you are sick. Your friends and parents will. Stay in touch.
5. Pay off your credit cards every month.
6. You don't have to win every argument. Agree to disagree.
7. Cry with someone. It's more healing than crying alone.
8. It's OK to get angry with God. He can take it.
9. Save for retirement starting with your first pay check.
10. When it comes to chocolate, resistance is futile.
11. Make peace with your past so it won't screw up the present.
12. It's OK to let your children see you cry.
13. Don't compare your life to others. You have no idea what their journey is all about.
14. If a relationship has to be a secret, you shouldn't be in it.
15. Everything can change in the blink of an eye. But don't worry; God never blinks.
16. Take a deep breath. It calms the mind.
17. Get rid of anything that isn't useful, beautiful or joyful.
18. Whatever doesn't kill you really does make you stronger.
19. It's never too late to have a happy childhood. But the second one is up to you and no one else.
20. When it comes to going after what you love in life, don't take no for an answer.
21. Burn the candles, use the nice sheets, wear the fancy lingerie. Don't save it for a special occasion. Today is special.
22. Over prepare, then go with the flow.
23. Be eccentric now. Don't wait for old age to wear purple.
24. The most important sex organ is the brain.
25. No one is in charge of your happiness but you.
26. Frame every so-called disaster with these words "In five years, will this matter?'
27. Always choose life.
28. Forgive everyone everything.
29. What other people think of you is none of your business.
30. Time heals almost everything. Give time - time.
31. However good or bad a situation is, it will change.
32. Don't take yourself so seriously. No one else does.
33. Believe in miracles.
34. God loves you because of who God is, not because of anything you did or didn't do.
35. Don't audit life. Show up and make the most of it now.
36. Growing old beats the alternative -- dying young.
37. Your children get only one childhood.
38. All that truly matters in the end is that you loved.
39. Get outside every day. Miracles are waiting everywhere.
40. If we all threw our problems in a pile and saw everyone else's, we'd grab ours back.
41. Envy is a waste of time. You already have all you need.
42. The best is yet to come.
43. No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and show up.
44. Yield.
45. Life isn't tied with a bow, but it's still a gift."
- Written By Regina Brett, 90 years old, of The Plain Dealer, Cleveland , Ohio
But life is life and life IS good. I will never regret being happy.
The struggles I am dealing with now really do not make me. It's like God is taking this whole situation, refocusing my thinking and reminding me I have to lean on Him. Okay- I'm listening!
Do any of these resonate with you? What motto has helped pull you through certain struggles?
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That is some great advice. I really like 25, 26, 31, and 42.
What you're going through sounds really scary, but you will get through it! I use the "keep your head up" phrase, too. I also tell myself, "you are strong, beautiful, confident, and capable of handling anything that life throws at you. Now go on and give it your best shot :)"
*Hugs*
Last July I was in a horrible car accident. I was hit head on by an SUV while driving my Honda. No one (including me) can believe I survived. My right eyeball came out, my chest was broken, my left arm snapped in half, my right toes went through my heel, my right leg was broken in 4 places, I was burned and bruised from my neck to my thighs. As a happy single mother of two wonderful kids and a health and PE teacher, if I survived...I knew my life would be drastically different from the way I once knew. Weeks in various hospitals, three surgeries (2 to go...yes!), 3 plates, some 20 screws, and hundreds of staples later...I sit here and type from my wheelchair reading the email forward you posted. I LOVE THEM ALL! But I would like to add one more: do it because you can and you never know when the day will come when you can't. Amidst your hurricane there is such beauty. I am inspired by you. Stay strong. Ciao.
What a great post. I love #40. A motto that has always worked for me is, "This too, shall pass." Good luck in the new place!
Fantastic list!! Whenever I'm feeling down and uncertain about my life I always remind myself to keep my eyes on the prize. Sure right now might suck but in the long run what I'm doing is going to be worth it :)
How lovely, thanks for sharing that. It really resonates, especially since I am going through a lot of the same things you are going through (moving, leaving my job/financial security, taking on new challenges, etc.) I know it will be tough, and that there will be moments when I'll doubt myself and wonder why I put myself in this situation, but the end result is definitely worth it.
i recently moved to a new city where I only know a couple people... and discovered my post-doc isn't the greatest place to be... so i feel your pain, and i really loved reading this. thanks ashley, and sending positive vibes your way :)
Ashley,
The one that really resonated with me was #27.
Always choose life.
I had someone I was very close to that lived her life fully, always choosing life while battling cancer for almost 12 years.
Best wishes to you and I hope you always choose life like Kelly did.
Such a good post. I think it's so easy to take life for granted and think every little thing that goes wrong is a big diasaster. Life is too short to worry about food and weight. I'd do well to remember that!
http://smallchangesaddup.wordpress.com
Good luck with your move. Change is always hard, but there's so much excitement to look forward to also.
Those mottos are great. But even though I know all of them, it's hard to believe them when times are tough. I'm sure I'd be a happier person if I did. In normal times, I agree with them wholeheartedly.
With that awesome attitude, you are going to sail through this new change smoothly!
I love #25 - only I can make me happy! I have direct control over my attitude in life :)
This is beautiful! Thanks for posting. I think I'm on the brink of a TON of change that will be occuring over the next couple years of my life, and some of those things are great advice. Stay strong and keep leaning on God!
Once you get to Orlando, let me know if you'd like to meet up - we live outside of Orlando and frequently visit!
Thank you so much for the reminder that we only have one life and that we should life it to the fullest and not waste time! The list really touched me and put things in perspective once again... Thanks!
Good luck with all your upcoming changes! Change is scary but also exciting! I wish you all the best, and don't forget to enjoy life every day in the midst of all the chaos! :)
Thanks for sharing this, Ashley ... there are MANY of these that I need to remember!
What a great inspirational post!
The simple things keep me chugging:
Do all things as though for the Lord.. This makes me a good worker and I never resent it.
My gramma used to say: It all comes out in the wash... meaning.. in the end, it all works out.. tomorrow still comes. Just keep on keepin' on.
More recently I've been clinging to: "Whatever is pure, noble, right" etc. God is on to something! how we choose to view life impacts.. .LIFE! He tells us to focus on the good and beautiful things.. Thank God!
Thank-you for sharing these. I've had some rough moments as of late and I can fully admit I've felt overwhelmed.
In the midst of all of this I try to remind myself "This too shall pass."
And you know what? It always does! :o)
Keep your chin up Ashley!
This is awesome Ashley! I really like this one:
4. Your job won't take care of you when you are sick. Your friends and parents will. Stay in touch.
I think it' so important to maintain connections with people no matter what - it's hard when moving sometimes, right? Or maybe you'll find that in the future. Anyways, I find it really helpful to stay in touch with old friends, even if it makes me kind of homesick...
Good luck with everything girl.
Ash, what a great post! Sometimes you just need to hear those things. Good luck in the new place with the new job. It may seem overwhelming now, but it will pass.
Hope
This is a great list! I was listening to Jillian Michaels' radio show this morning, and she brought up this Woody Allen quote: "Comedy = Tragedy + Time." I think that is a strangely comforting quote! Like no matter how bad anything seems right now, you'll eventually be able to look back and laugh. Nothing is more true.
I think all these changes for you are reason to celebrate!
All of those are great reminders. I tend to get caught up in my own problems, and forget to realize that they could be worse.
:( I am sorry that you are going through troubles, changes can be so scary.
Hopefully you are finding some sunshine behind those clouds :) Keep your chin up girlie
Great list!!! So true!!!!
-A
such a great list :) Don't be nervous! You're gonna do great! You're amazing and strong and can get through anything!
#5, 11, 25.
Hoping everything goes smoothly even if it is scary!
Make sure to be good to yourself and honor all of the feelings, good and bad that you feel. Moving and switching jobs are among the top most stressful things in life- but they can also bring amazing opportunity, new friends, new hobbies, sights, and new food!! :)
Those fwds can be so annoying, but then you come across one like this. so much important info to take to heart.
This is awesome! I am printing this out and posting it at my desk to remind myself of these things everyday!
Thanks for sharing these wonderful words of widsom.
Have a great week!
i love that post! i totally feel you on the whole leaving behind family and friends. we are strong independent woman! we will be ok anywhere we go, and with anything we do!